There is a George Bush in every barroom in Texas.
This particular one lucked onto a career opportunity.

Friends of Hillary
PO Box 3150
New York, NY 10117-0233

Hi Hillary:

I'm in receipt of your letter and 2005 Critical National Issues Survey and Request for Money, which was sent to me by mistake. The DNC actually sent a similar piece on the same day, the 2005 Grassroots Survey of Democratic Leaders and Request for Money. Perhaps your database, like theirs, has not been updated. I am no longer a Democrat, and can not, therefore, help with your planning and funding or vote in your primaries.

You still there kiddo? Don't worry, I have not gone over to the Republicans. As a modern American I don't really believe that a wrathful God would cast my soul into the outer darkness for voting Republican, but the superstitious Catholic in me cannot dismiss the possibility.

My defection was a personal decision to reconnect with clarity. The Bush junta has effectively hijacked this country, using techniques no less brazen than the James Gang employed for robbing trains. Cheney's duck hunting pals on the high court don't strike me as providing any credible checks or balances to executive power. Congressional Democrats, nicely characterized last year by Arianna Huffington as dithering poltroons, have now relaxed into the President's pocket, which explains the smell of lint and sour shorts you must have noticed. You all speak the same language and believe in the same fictions and pretend that there is not a huge, ugly elephant in the room. You have become the willing stooges of a piratical collusion of big oil and big guns embarked on an incompetent and lethal agenda to savage the people of sovereign countries and slurp up their vital resources. We are common thieves, dearie. Our circumstances are so much worse than anybody is willing to say out loud that I can not imagine how anybody is able to keep up the pretense of it, let alone address this dopey survey, which is a xerox of the same ancillary issues you sent out two years ago.

Posturing, morally compromised politicos who think they can get my vote simply by being less horrible than the alternative are mistaken. I won't waste my support on people who can not speak the obvious. This country is lost in a dream. My candidate, the morally consistent, wide awake Arthurian hero who will restore our interest in goodness and intelligence and transparency, has not yet emerged from the crowd. If you spot him let me know, and I will do the same.

Please contact me when you are ready to impeach and indict and frog walk this batch of flies to the maximum security loony bin where they belong. Drop a line when you've got a presidential plan to escort our bloated, delusional nation back to normal size to take its place, like Finland, in the global village, content with a token army, a non-exceptional per capita income, a mediocre educational system and an undistinguished infant mortality rate.

The good news for all of us is that Bush's approval rating is at a record low of 40%, just a few points above Nixon's at the worst of Watergate. The bad news is that the approval rating of Congress is even worse. I hope you have some luck getting an independent investigation of why FEMA is staffed with Bush cronies instead of professionals. But like the dirty photos from Abu Ghraib I think many of you suspect that the deeper you look the nastier it is going to get. I would be surprised if you have the power any longer to bring them to account, or the will to exhume all those bodies. And then there is the danger of success. If the Bush people were to unexpectedly self destruct, would the Democrats have any better clue as to where we might go from here?

Say hi to Bill for me when he gets back from George and Barbara's.

Your friend,